HAIL TO THE CHEF
By T-N Food & Shit Correspondent Julian Veg
Flaming Ramsay
The Ministry of Food , Filth & Fornication has announced a new push to get the British people eating correctly. As a result the Minister, Sir Dick Slider, will announce shortly a new Food Tsar.
No more 'pukka grub' and softly, softly approach the Tsar will push forward plain, honest tucker the whole country can consume. Favourite for the post is plain speaking Gordon 'Fu*&ing' Ramsay.
Ramsay is not confirming the new role, which in political parlance means he's a shoe in, and has issued the following statement through his agent Fanny Filcher:
Hoots mon, I cannae fucking believe it, just when I dinnae have a pot ta piss in my mate Gordon throws me a fucking life line. All I have ta dae is dress up some keek 'n' tatties and I'll rake it in. He went on to say something like "shit, knickers, piss, wank, cock, twat, bastards, fucking sassanachs, arses", but it could have just been jock speak.
Last Updated::: 03-Oct-2009 11:05
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